2.17.2011

Season Previews: Colorado Rockies


With Spring Training camps already open, it's time for one of our favorite things in all the world: Season Previews. Four years ago, they began as a semi-serious analysis and ended up as half-assed haiku. We're just gonna go with what we know. Continuing with our preview of the National League West, here are the Colorado Rockies.

CarGo is the shit
Tulo got an extension
He's also awesome

Chris Ianetta
Will squat down behind the plate
See more time at bat

Jose Morales
Will steal his job before long
Cause that kid can hit

Stewart at third base
Todd Helton's goatee at first
Wigginton backs up

Look at that drawing!
The likeness is uncanny
But no Wilson Beard

Seth Smith in left field
Eric Young playing backup
Dexter in center

Jiminez is the
First man in the rotation
That makes him the Ace

Aaron Cook can pitch
Jorge De La Rosa is
Also pretty great

Huston Street will close
Behind a decent bullpen
Like Matt Belisle!

I can't stop looking
at that drawing of Helton
Just ridiculous

Good enough to win
The National League West crown?
I don't see why not

[Rox Pile] | [Purple Row] | [Rockies Review]

5 comments:

Braden said...

"CarGo is the shit"

Indeed he is.

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHA! Sweet uni-brow, Todd.

Sooze said...

I know!

Clare said...

Where did you find that fantastic caricature, and will all of your previews will be graced with one?!

Sooze said...

Ha! Are you volunteering Clare? :)

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