Now that it's Spring, it's time for one of our favorite things in all the world: Season Previews. Two years ago, they began as a serious analysis and ended up as half-assed haiku. We're just gonna go with what we know. Moving right along with our preview of the National League Central, we give you: the Cincinnati Reds.
Jay Bruce is the man
Bronson wails on his guitar
Please put your leg down
Cordero: bad ass
Using one name for one line?
Encarnacion!
Micah Owings: yum
Brandon Phillips is so fast
Junior up and left
Jonny Gomes: no H
Joe Morgan is a homer
Poor Jacque Jones can't play
Dusty Baker: meh
Taveras likes to steal bags
But not hit homers
Harang's fastball is
Nothing to write home about
But has nice sliders
74 wins
(that makes 88 losses)
Isn't all that great
Time to step it up
Try to shoot for 80 wins
Maybe even fourth!
[Red Reporter] | [Redlegs Rundown] | [Redleg Nation]
3.09.2009
Season Previews: Cincinnati Reds
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6 Comments:
Whoa! That lady looks nuts. And yes, Bronson Arroyo should absolutely put his leg down. He looks like a dog about to urinate.
I bet you'd look hot in those earrings Sooze.
They look kind of uncomfortable.
Bronson Aroyo is a tool. Have you seen all the used car dealership ads he's been in? yes. Put your leg down.
That lady looks irritated. Probably by the Reds' quality of play.
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